Christmas Bitter and Christmas Sweet by Tim Challies

 There are not many “pure” celebrations in this world, not many occasions in which we are only festive, only rejoicing, only merry. Especially as our lives go on, especially as the years and decades pass, we accumulate more to mourn, more to grieve, more to lament. Eventually every joy is tempered by at least some measure of grief, every new pleasure wistful about some memory of pain. Few celebrate their 40th birthday with the abandon of their 10th, their 50th anniversary with the unadulterated joy of their 1st. Though life brings many pleasures, it also brings many pains.

As the holidays draw near, many feel sorrow approaching in lockstep with joy. The same storm that brings much-needed rain to the fields also threatens to wash out the picnic and the parade. And just so, as the Christmas season comes, many feel the rush that comes with giving gifts and enjoying feasts and marking celebrations, but at the same time the ache that comes when they hang fewer stockings than in years past, when they set fewer places round the table, when they see a face missing from the family photographs. Though they truly do celebrate, there is bitter mixed with their sweet, dark shadows that temper their light.

They may find themselves wishing that God would take their pain away, that at least on the days of great celebration they would be able to experience a joy that is pure and unadulterated, untouched by the presence of sorrow. Just for a day, couldn’t they have pleasure without pain, smiles without tears, new memories without the encroachment of old ones?

But to take their grief away, God would need to take their love away, for love and grief are like the daffodils of early spring in which two flowers bloom from a single stem. There is no grief where there has not been love and no love that comes without risk of grief. They weep because they have loved and because they love still. Absence makes the heart grow warmer, not colder, and while time may temper wounds, it has no power to heal them.

They cannot plead that God would take their love away, for love is too precious and their loved ones too dear. They cannot plead that God would make them forget, for there is no forgetting ones who gave them such joy, who loved them with such fierce affection. They cannot plead that all would go back to the way it was, for the pathway through life leads in but one direction so that the way is always forward and never back.

But they can plead that God would gave them faith to trust, faith to believe, faith to endure—faith to trust that even this weighty trial will some day prove to be a light and momentary affliction, faith to believe in the word of the God who says he will wipe away every tear from their eyes, faith to endure with confidence that steadfastness will have its full effect within them, making them perfect and complete, so that they lack nothing.

As they awaken on Christmas morn, their eyes glistening with tears of sorrow and joy, their hearts longing for what was and what is, perhaps they—perhaps we—can pause for a moment to consider that though God has called us to bear this sore grief, it blooms from the very same stem that bears such sweet love. Perhaps we can pause to thank God that the degree of our grief simply proves the extent of our love. And perhaps we can pause to praise God for his gift of love, for in moments like these we have to acknowledge that it truly is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

10 Reasons Older Women Should Mentor Younger Women in Your Church by Chuck Lawless

 I believe in mentoring as one component of disciplemaking. My experience, though, is that too few churches challenge their members to invest in others. My goal in this post is to challenge women in the church to mentor younger women (and, many of these reasons for doing so would also apply to older men mentoring younger men). 

1. The Bible requires it. Titus 2:3-5 expects that young women will learn from older women who have lived out their faith in the Lord. If our churches ignore this calling, the next generation suffers.
2. God never expected us to travel our journey alone. When He said, “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Gen 2:18), His point was not that everyone is to be married; it was that He created us in such a way that we need others in our lives. Younger women especially need older women to walk with them. 
3. Many younger women have had few or no healthy female role models in their life. Mothers have a unique bond with their children, but not every mother is a model of godliness. Some young women are still waiting to become close friends with a godly female.
4. They will be spouses and moms in a culture ever turning from God’s standards. Young women will be called to live their faith in a world increasingly opposed to Christianity. They shouldn’t be expected to walk that path without an older role model.  
5. They are future leaders of some church ministries. Churches differ in what roles women can play in a congregation, but younger women will lead some types of church ministries in the future. What they see modeled now will help them in the days to come.
6. Younger women are longing for mentors in the faith. Men have no monopoly on this need. Younger women are equally seeking older women who will give them time.
7. Even young women face temptations such as pornography. As morals change and sin becomes more acceptable, even young women face issues we once assumed were limited to men. Many women, though, have no place to turn for support and guidance. 
8. Woman-to-woman discipling can prepare younger women for the mission field. In some places of the world, only women have access to minister to other women. Being a disciple now will help younger women prepare for this role. 
9. Even a few minutes of godly attention can change a younger woman’s life.  Investing in a younger woman does not require a seminary degree or a ministry calling. All it requires is an older woman who walks with God – and a younger woman’s life may then never be the same.
10. Younger women with mentors will someday become older women themselves. That means, of course, they’ll be the next generation to carry on the work of investing in others. Guiding them now will help others in the future.