When Should You Leave a Church? by James Emery White

Let’s talk about something that isn’t often talked about. When should you leave a church? It’s not like leaving other organizations. Sure, there are times it’s a non-issue, like when you have to move. But the rest of the time? A church is a family, so leaving is like a divorce.  And, like a marriage, you shouldn’t divorce on a whim. So let’s start off with why you shouldn’t leave a church. You shouldn’t leave angry over unresolved conflict. This is the number one reason why people leave, and it’s the number one worst reason for leaving. The goal of Christian community is to work things out. So work it out. Only leave if you can’t pursue biblical conflict resolution to its intended end, which is reconciliation. You shouldn’t leave for the next “it” thing. In too many cities, there is a migratory pattern among churched believers going to whatever is the “next, next” thing. The hot youth group, the hot speaker, the hot singles ministry, the hot… you get it. This is based on a consumerist mindset as well as insecurity. Neither is a good reason to leave. You shouldn’t leave because you’ve put your kids in charge. This one is tricky, but let me delve in. Let’s say little Johnny suddenly decides he wants to go to a friend’s church. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the church you are attending, it’s just that Johnny has a new friend, or set of friends, and wants to go where they go. This plays on every parental insecurity about wanting Johnny happy and churched, so you go to the new church.  This is a bad precedent. Not only does it trivialize what involvement and membership in a church community is meant to embody, but it puts Johnny in the driver’s seat of the family’s spiritual commitments instead of the parents. Johnny’s friends will come and go, and when they do, you will have left the church you loved. Better to ride things out with Johnny than make a knee-jerk decision to uproot and move.  You shouldn’t leave because you feel your needs aren’t being met, you aren’t being ministered to or you aren’t “getting anything” out of the service. Let’s call this what it is: spiritual narcissism. The value of narcissism is the classic “I – me – mine” mentality that places personal pleasure and fulfillment at the forefront of concerns. Historian Christopher Lasch went so far as to christen ours “the culture of narcissism,” calling it our new religion. As Christians, this should be antithetical. We follow a Savior who said, “I did not come to be served but to serve, and to give my life as a ransom for many (Matthew 20:28)”, “Whoever wants to be first must become last (Mark 9:35)”, and “Whoever wants to be great among you must become the slave of all (Matthew 20:26).” And who then bowed in submission to the Father and said, “Not my will, but yours (Luke 22:42).” Yet a spiritual narcissism has invaded our thinking, where the individual needs and desires of the believer become the center of attention. “I want to go where I’m fed” or “I need to be ministered to” rolls off our tongues without even blushing. The Bible teaches we should be learning to feed ourselves and seek not to be served, but to serve others. When we walk out of a worship service and say, “I didn’t get anything out of it” – as if worship were about what wereceive rather than what we give to God – that’s idolatry, making ourselves the focus of worship instead of God. Spiritual narcissism is no reason to leave a church. It’s a reason to repent. So when should you leave? You should leave because there is genuine theological disagreement. If a church or its leadership or its teaching body departs from historic Christian orthodoxy, you should leave. Just make sure you are defining historic Christian orthodoxy in the right way and not making tertiary matters primary. You should leave because the leadership has lost integrity and is not being held accountable. There are churches where the leaders have drifted from financial integrity, sexual integrity or integrity related to the proper manifestation of humility and servanthood, and there is no mechanism for accountability or no willingness to engage it. In other words, a blind eye is being turned toward what are, in fact, biblically disqualified leaders. You are not called to follow or support leadership that has forfeited their right to lead even though they remain in leadership.  You should leave because the vision, values and mission have drifted from its biblical moorings, and there is no sense that they will return to shore. If a church has a mission that “lost people matter to God and therefore they should matter to us,” but over time has drifted from evangelistic fervor with no indication that it will ever fan those embers back into a flame, go where it’s burning. But the bottom line? For most of us, the choice should be to stay. Just as the easy-divorce mentality of our day is an affront to God’s vision for marriage, the easy-departure mentality from church involvement is an affront to God’s vision for the church as the new community. So while there are a few times we should leave, … there are many more times when we should stay. James Emery White About the Author James Emery White is the founding and senior pastor of Mecklenburg Community Church in Charlotte, NC, and the ranked adjunctive professor of theology and culture at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, where he also served as their fourth president. His latest book, Meet Generation Z: Understanding and Reaching the New Post-Christian World, is available on Amazon. To enjoy a free subscription to the Church & Culture blog, visit ChurchAndCulture.org, where you can view past blogs in our archive and read the latest church and culture news from around the world. Follow Dr. White on twitter @JamesEmeryWhite.

I Won't Let Cancer Take Away My Sundays

(In light of what I preached Sunday about the church being the "assembled ones for the purpose of Worship), this came through my email this morning. Had to share it.

“I won’t let cancer take away my Sundays” these are some words I won’t soon forget.

I heard them last Sunday from a sweet saint, who despite being in quite obvious pain made her way to church just like she had for the past year since learning about her cancer. Soon she’ll begin her second bout of chemo and she requested prayer from the elders. She went on to say that despite being in great pain she simply didn’t want to miss out on worshipping God with her brothers and sisters in Christ.

The profundity of her mumbled explanation for why she hadn’t stayed home this Sunday or any in the last year for that matter hit me hard. I’ve always said that there’s no place I’d rather be than with God’s people on Sunday morning and Sunday night but I’ve never had cancer in my lungs. Perhaps the bed would be a greater desire for me if I had cancer. And yet for this sweet saint, church was better despite the pain she incurred in coming.
I couldn’t help but think about Hebrews 10:32-34.


Paul here in these verses is reminding the Hebrews about the former days when they suffered severe persecution for their faith. He says,

But remember the former days, when, after being enlightened, you endured a great conflict of sufferings, partly by being made a public spectacle through reproaches and tribulations, and partly by becoming sharers with those who were so treated. For you showed sympathy to the prisoners and accepted joyfully the seizure of your property, knowing that you have for yourselves a better possession and a lasting one.

Paul tells these people experienced some very difficult times. Losing their homes, beatings and imprisonment and of course many lost their lives as well. Meeting with and being recognized as part of the church was difficult. It could bring some serious consequences.
What makes these words outrageous is that they come after verses 24-25 where he says,

And let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.

Paul has the audacity to tell them not to neglect the gathering! Hebrews 10:24-25 is the famous go-to passage to take someone to if they have a tendency to skip church but a lot of times we fail to connect it to the words coming less than 10 verses later If they meet regularly they dramatically increase the chances that they’ll be found out and persecuted.

Sometimes I wonder what would happen to our churches if severe persecution were to come to our area. How often would people come?

Likely for some the fear of losing a house or a job might prove to be too much of a temptation and they would stay home most of the time. For others though, I suspect that the church would become more of an oasis and far sweeter than ever before. Something they would never, ever, want to miss.

Luther famously said, to gather with God’s people in united adoration of the Father is as necessary to the Christian life as prayer. I would add if I could that not only is it necessary but a natural overflow of that necessity would be a desire for fellowship. That the need would penetrate the heart and the emotions and that a person that truly grasps the importance of gathering with fellow believers will be looking forward to Sunday, and wouldn’t let much of anything stand between them and the ability to gather with their brothers and sisters in Christ.

There are many legitimate reasons to miss church, and this post is not an encouragement to go to church and get everyone sick. Many mom’s in particular come to my mind, who out of great selflessness stay home and miss out on church for the sake of others, they are not to feel burdened in any way. Of course, use wisdom in determining whether or not you should attend church on a particular Sunday. Talk about it with your disciple and with people in your church. Many times, skipping might be the best choice. This post is not a criticism of missing church for any legitimate reason. This post was borne out of a comment a sweet saint from my church made, who despite the trial she was facing and despite the pain she was suffering simply wasn’t going to let it get in the way of her and the chance to worship the Lord with her brothers and sisters.

In short, missing church seemed to make her sicker than cancer ever could.

May we too, love gathering with the church so much that missing church would bring us great sadness. May this also be a reminder for us to reach out to our brothers and sisters who are unable to attend and to be an encouragement to them as well.

(The original post found here)

From the Shepherd's Heart....Wednesday, February 21, 2018

Once a year I spend a Wednesday night with our children and students.  In the fall, I got to teach with our children and tonight I get to be with our students.  Normally this is a Q-&-A time but then I always get to preach some too.

Keith Williams will be leading and teaching for me tonight in the Auditorium.  I admire this faithful servant, Deacon, and Sunday School teacher who has taught for over 35 years.

Don't miss tonight at 6:10 with a full schedule of services.

Worship as a Lifestyle as seen in the life of Noah

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This past Sunday I preached about the church as "the assembly of God called out to worship God."  Then Sunday night I shared these thought about "Worship is seen as a lifestyle." 

Since I did not have notes for Sunday night, here are my collected thoughts.

The first time something is mentioned in the Bible, it is always important.

With Noah, we capture the first time an altar is mentioned and a burnt offering.

But Noah’s example of worship started before the altar.

Genesis 6:8 – It started with Noah finding grace in the eyes of the Lord.  In the midst of a wicked culture, God’s favor rested on Noah.

Then God told Noah to do something he had never heard of (ark), because it was going to do something Noah had never heard of (rain) and told him how to build it.

What does Noah do?

Genesis 6: 22 – twice it says “Noah did.”  Noah obeyed and not for just a few days…but 120 years.

And after the period of the building, and the actual flood, when Noah gets off the ark he builds an altar and offers sacrifices (Genesis 8: 20) and it results in the Lord “smelling a soothing aroma.” (Verse 21).

This is the true picture of worship.

Worship begins with God initiating it.

Worship continues with constant communion with God.

Worship is a Lifestyle of obedience to God’s will and ways.
Worship is then offering an act of worship that is pleasing to the Lord.

From Every Tribe and Language and People and Nation.....

We Welcome Dwayne Moore to Rainsville this Sunday

This Sunday our students are away on their Winter Retreat and Bro. Keith is on vacation, so I've invited a friend to come and lead our music this Sunday.

Dwayne Moore is the founder and CEO of Next Level Worship International, Inc. (www.NLWInternational.com), a non-profit ministry serving worship leaders and churches around the world.  He has sung and spoken in over 1000 churches and conferences.  He served on staff with Scott Dawson for 10 years traveling as an evangelist throughout the US.  Dwayne has also served in churches as worship and teaching pastor.  He's the author of numerous books, including the award-winning Pure Praise:  A Heart-focused Bible Study on Worship.

He and his wife, Sonia, recently moved back to their home in Lacey Springs, AL from Louisville.

I have known Dwayne for almost 40 years.  We did revivals together as far back as the 70's.  He is an anointed worship leader and writer.  Praise teams of churches I've pastored has used his Pure Praise.

We will be blessed this Sunday morning to have Dwayne with us.

I further am so pumped about sharing the Word with you this Sunday.  On Sunday morning I will continue to ask the question...Why are we doing this Next Level Process?  Is the church worth it? 

Then Sunday night...of my..how I am loving Philemon.  This Sunday night we will examine verses 2-7 of Paul's view of Philemon and who Paul knew him to be.  We will see some Godly characteristics that need to be in our lives and a great example to follow.


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When You Grieve a Prodigal’s Sin More than He or She Does by Chuck Lawless

If it hasn’t happened to you yet as a believer, I suspect it will – that is, you’ll face a time when you grieve someone’s sin more than he or she does. When you walk in the footsteps of the father of the prodigal son, hang on to these thoughts: 

1. Keep praying. When you quit praying, your silence is a confession that you’ve given up on somebody—and on God. Prayerlessness leaves prodigals living in sin.
2. Keep believing. God knows exactly where your prodigal is. The One who created him (or her) and died for him still loves him; in fact, He loves your prodigal more than you do.
3. Keep walking. Stay faithful yourself. Don’t turn in anger from God. You can’t expect Him to answer your prayers for somebody else when you’re not walking with Him yourself.   
4. Keep standing. Here’s my point (and it’s not an easy one): don’t let your prodigal’s departure lead you to redefine what is right and wrong. Sin remains sin, regardless of how much we love the people living in it.
5. Keep grieving. That means your anguish may not go away entirely, but the minute you stop grieving sin is the minute you also start caring less about your prodigal’s choices. Agonizing over sin keeps you on your knees—the right place to be on behalf of a prodigal.
6. Keep loving. There’s a legitimate place for church discipline, but many prodigals have walked away from the church first because they assume the church will reject them. Love your prodigal even if others don’t seem to—and even if he or she thinks you’ve lost your love, too.
7. Keep listening. Follow the Spirit’s guide to know when and how to speak into the situation, but be willing to listen more than speak if needed. An open ear might take you a long way with your prodigal.   
8. Keep waiting. Returning to God is seldom easy for a prodigal. It’s sometimes equally hard to return home. Wait patiently (and then be patient when he or she does come home, as change usually takes a while . . . ).
9. Keep trusting. To be honest, God might allow your prodigal to suffer the pains of disobedience to turn him back toward Him. You might want to try to fix the situation so that doesn’t happen, but trust God. He knows what’s needed.
10. Keep watching. Keep your eyes on the driveway. You never know when you’ll see your prodigal on his way home.

This Sunday, February 11 at Rainsville First Baptist - We Welcome Pastor Tim Anderson

This Sunday, February 11, we welcome Tim Anderson, Senior Pastor of Clements Baptist Church in Athens, Alabama, since 1994.  

His weekly radio, television, internet and Defining Moment Ministry reaches thousands of homes, not only in Alabama, Mississippi and Tennessee, but throughout the United States as well as internationally. 

Pastor Tim is known for his practical preaching and strong gift of exhortation.  His seminary education stems from Samford University, New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary and Andersonville Baptist Theological Seminary. 

In addition to serving as the Senior Pastor of Clements Baptist Church, Tim serves as the President and Director of the International Congress on Revival (ICR) in South Africa, Budapest, Hungary and South America.  In addition, he also sits on the Board of Regents, University of Mobile. 

Pastor Tim and his wife Sherry have three children, two daughters-in-love, one son-in-love and four precious grandchildren.

Pastor Tim will be preaching in the 10:15 and 6:00 services.  Don't miss hearing one of God's choice north Alabama servants.